A January of prayer | Jan. 21 | Grandpa’s memorial

 a January of prayer | praying through the first month of 2024

A January of Prayer

| 21 January 2024

Today I’ve been a weeping mess of tears and emotions. 

Today was my Grandpa’s memorial. 

We dressed in black and dark colors. It had been raining earlier and clouds covered the sky and a cool wind blew. Don’t you love it when the weather matches your emotions? 

We got to see family I haven’t seen for years and I got to see people who knew and loved my Grandpa. It was really sweet hearing different stories and memories. We (my siblings and I) all went up with my parents when they spoke about my grandpa. I couldn’t stop crying. I miss him so much. My dad shared about a missionary story he had that was impactful to his life and that he found out later (after his passing) that Grandpa had been praying for him and you got to see how it all connects. You see prayers being answered. Miracles happening. God’s foresight. My mom shared how Grandpa was a true father to her and was an answer to prayer and who was a healing presence in her life. 

My uncle Dan shared the songs my Grandpa wrote for each of his sons. He talked about how good Grandpa was and all the happy memories he has. He talked about “cheeks”. That was something Grandpa started when I was born and I just started crying.

Then my uncle Joe shared about Grandpa’s constant and unconditional love and support of him. I know that was also grandpa in my life. He was always excited for whatever I did. He was my best friend. He poured his love and time and energy and money to me. He was my biggest supporter outside of my parents and siblings. He was so BIG in my life. He was that for my uncle. I couldn’t stop crying through his speech. 

Then at the end my aunt Erin sang a song—“The Blessing”. It was so beautiful and also hard to listen to. Hard because it made me miss Grandpa. Hard because he isn’t here. Still, it was so beautiful. 

There was also this slideshow of his life. You see him through the years from when he was a young boy to right before his death. I just started weeping. When they showed him with my mom and dad on their wedding day, I lost it. Then when I saw a picture from when I was little then at my graduation and then all the pictures of him with my family and siblings. I just couldn’t stop the tears from falling down. I cried off all my makeup. My eyes are swollen now. My heart feels heavy. I miss him so much. It’s still hard to believe he is gone. 

There is this feeling that…we just have to get through this and then everything will be back to normal and Grandpa will come over. That will never happen. That hurts. It really hurts. I don’t know if that hurt will ever be filled. 

Have you ever met someone that is so full of love and goodness and light and Jesus that even before they say they are a Christian you already know it? Have you ever had this feeling deep inside of you that upon meeting someone you just know they are a child of God? 

That was my Grandpa for me. 

Before I ever knew in words that he was a Christian, he showed himself in his actions and the presence around him that he was a Christian. It was so a part of him. So big. So present. So much a part of him that you didn’t even need to ask to know because deep inside you knew. 

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I want to talk about this more soon in a bigger post devoted to this topic. This is an important topic to me and something I think will be really cool to discuss! 

I’ll chat with you soon! 

What I read…

• Psalm 109 

Previous days…

• A January of Prayer
• Jan. 03 | the first real snow
• Jan. 04 | Practicing trusting God 
• Jan. 05 | a living book  
• Jan. 06 | prayer for protection & snow  
• Jan. 07 | “what I have written I have written”  
• Jan. 08 | good morning to you  
• Jan. 09 | one of my favorite verses   
• Jan. 10 | a sick day    
• Jan. 11 | a sick day 2   
• Jan. 12 | the sickness that shall not be named    
• Jan. 14 | a month since grandpa passed   
• Jan. 17 | my sister’s 15th birthday     
• Jan. 18 | cleaning day w/ photos 
• Jan. 19 | an editing day      
• Jan. 20 | finding the balance of justice and love as a Christian

God bless us, every one 

If you think to pray for me and my family I will be forever grateful! If you have a prayer request or need please comment and let me know! 

Goodnight! <3 

Love, 

Moriyah